This piece is Janelle's (CEO and CO-FOUNDER of ANSHI) return to writing after a 6-month break. She writes from the heart, which we have all come and expected Janelle to do. Nothing here is meant to be taken as medical advice or scientific theory. We live in an unparalleled time in human history; the act of writing, sharing ideas, is ancient and engrained into the very fabric of what it means to be truly human. May we all stay open to receive, share, and think for the betterment and survival of our world as a human race. Never let ANYONE keep you silent from speaking your truth. And here is Janelle’s.
Over the last six months I’ve encountered some of the darkest, scariest, saddest parts of humanity. I went away, blessed with the opportunity and gift of a stable child in school all day. I watch so many people forget just how amazing that truly is. A gift. A gift of health, of community, of friendships. Something I would whisper about to Raegan and talk about, and imagine the gift of school sitting in an ICU.
The key to happiness. IMO.
I spent 30 days dealing with traumas, facing my demons. DEEP WORK. I lost the ability to go the bathroom fully and had a UTI that took me to two ER’s and lasted over 6 weeks. I dealt with that trauma and I don’t care if I have to sing tinkle tinkle little star in the bathroom to remain UTI free.
TRAUMA is real folks. Just ask any ER doctor or nurse. It leaves imprints on our body. Until we let it go.
I spent over 150 stays mostly ICU’s for my kid to go to school like every other child from 8-3pm. For years.
Was it worth it? HELL YES. Her smiles, her vocalizations on the path to verbal, every challenge, every single moment of pain, hurt, trauma was worth it for Raegan. For Raegan to be able to finally help herself.
As a mother, it is our duty to protect to our children at all costs. My road was harder than most but it is still the same road every mother travels for their child. I am a deeply religious and spiritual person now. Because I lived where children die. And that is where the angels go my friends. We are human. I am human. But every step of the way I never stopped being a mother who just loved her child enough to save her and protect her. Until she could do it for herself.
ANSHI literally means God’s Gift. That name found my best friend Viktoria, ANSHI's Co-Founder, and I sitting on the floor of Rady Children’s Hospital. After the first few long stays people stop showing up - you slip into a category of society that just exists, shamed, with an ever revolving door of stays.
Roughly 50% of hospital patients are chronically ill. And in pediatrics they are mostly pre-verbal (I do not use the term nonverbal-it doesn’t exist in the human species we all have the capacity for language- thought is already there).
I THOUGHT a lot about what I was going to write. How to tell my story of what happened to me without creating more divides. More problems. More people having “meetings” about what to do about me. Like I am some problem society thinks is meant to be “dealt with” by institutions, organizations, constructs of humanity that should never control an individual. Ever.
I live my life by simple values and truths. And I don’t bend. That got me in trouble. A lot.
I did not know how to communicate. I did not know how to stay calm. I was exhausted, chronically sleep deprived, and living in flight or fight with a dose of 15 cups of a day chamomile tea anxiety to boot. Why? Because I carried the traumas I endured for Raegan around with me.
Until I stopped. Walked out a door and into a place run by minions. No just kidding. See, I wrote a children’s book about minions while at treatment for PTSD and Trauma and stayed at a facility run by RESURGENCE in Costa Mesa, CA. I spent 30 days shedding trauma, facing my own inability to face myself. And I healed, slowly. I made life long friends. Connected with people doing DEEP WORK TOO. And I felt safe.
And I got myself back. Happy.
If we as a society can’t talk about mental health, and the impacts of sleep in medically fragile families then what the heck do you want to do with us? I see the in and out ones. A car accident, sports injury gone really bad, the care level, approach to care, the sheer BELIEF IN THE HUMAN BODY TO OVERCOME - its everywhere in healthcare.
But to the other 50%? Well. We have a lot of work to do. Important work. Life saving work. When ANSHI got in Rochester Magazine it was a MILESTONE of significance. The author also edits Mayo Clinic Magazine. 60,000 of the brightest minds in healthcare exposed to our story.
Wow. Well-done ANSHI. Our story was reaching the right people with the right message.
BELIEVE IN US.
BELIEVE IN OUR ABILITY TO HEAL TOO.
I’ll end this with some pictures, before and after of Raegan because images tell a story that words cannot. I hope that our road to billions is filled with millions of not only happy customers, but customers finding relief to their own issues, in their own way, on their time. No industry - no system - no organization - nothing can stop it.
We are about empowering the individual to connect with plants. 1 to 1. And you get to decide how you use this product. I said it in 2018 when we launched - a very traumatic personal week for me - and I’ll say it again. We let you decide how to use this product and therein lay its power.
This road has not been easy. Resistance when you are doing something special and meaningful is EVERYWHERE. But, was it worth it? Hell yeah. For Raegan? Soon she will be able to tell you herself what it means to LOVE more than any…one….thing….
LOVE. It all really does come down to love, and the healing power of touch. Thank you friends for being on this journey so far. Its about to get really fun for us - and you as our customers!
Oh, and one more thing. Life is really absolutely amazing when you stop, disconnect, slow down - and observe. Each of us, every moment, of every single day until our last BREATH have an opportunity for greatness. To create, to write your own story, to be what you were born to be without stress. To my reader, you are amazing, wake up and see the sunrise for 7 days straight and come back and comment. ☺
Your personal truth is beautiful and real. I applaud you for putting it out there. Though I can never fully understand what you’ve all been through, I saw your face during some of those years and I felt your struggle. You did well and you made it! And in the meantime you launched a product and a movement to heal. Very few people have that kind of inner strength. Remind yourself daily that you are a warrior. Well done and thank you for sharing.
Thank you Janelle for sharing your story and the strength to fight for your beautiful daughter Raegan. We as mothers are so compassionate and nurturing to our children and when we see our child suffering we also suffer and it takes a toll on us mentally and emotionally which can also cause physical trauma as well. I am grateful that I discovered your Anshiheals products and that my contribution is greatly appreciated. God Bless You and Viktoria for delivering healing to so many people , and especially for Raegan.